Brenda Dickson: Welcome to her kitchen.

Oh, Golly. Where to start this morning?

I think I’ll just begin as I do every morning– with fashion, diet, and exercise advice from Brenda Dickson.

There are some people in this world who spend entirely too much time on Youtube. I count myself among them. One of my favorite discoveries has been Miss Dickson. She’s been somewhat of a sensation on the website over the past several months, elevating an otherwise forgettable actress to cult star status.

She’s been parodied dozens of times, but her original, self-produced self-help video “Welcome to My Home” (1987) needs no added commentary to be both horrifying and hilarious– it’s so vain, yet so well intentioned that it’s impossible not to love. It is gorgeous, wonderful Camp. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, I shall refer you to the late Susan Sontag– she can explain it all to you.

And then I shall cry.

Here is part two of Miss Dickson’s video. Her diet advice begins at 4:14, but warm up a little with her exercise routine (with her dog, Charles). There is nothing more to be said, there is only to watch.

Enjoy. Just remember: Salt can make your face puffy, and sugar causes wrinkles.